you were wearing plaid in my dreams

by there will be fish

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released May 24, 2016

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there will be fish Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

an adult with a computer and a few musical instruments.

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Track Name: coming out, an introduction
balls of yarn
or carcasses
either way, it's my
artifice. i am
decomposing too
quick for this
please bury me soon.

this ink puts my
skin at rest
these scars are my
latest mess. let that
splinter pierce through my
shallow chest. I have
nothing else left to blame.

when stars reach from a
bove the clouds and
monsters creep from their
closet shrouds and the
maidens fair cut their
ribbons out
what a travesty.

no apologies for this
seething rage. not a
call for keys to my
fleshy cage. not a
passing phase
nor a coming of age--oh!
i was meant for the stage.
Track Name: bring back mom jeans (are moms girls)
aislado

I see you there
such a pretty stare
disheveled hair
like you don't care

three hours of sleep
you're in too deep
you sow what you reap
but you're too cheap

(bring back mom jeans)
show off them childbearing hips
and your lovestained lips
I just wanna take a dip
in your mom jeans

how do you survive
the incessant cries
and your bloodstained thighs
that I idolize

(bring back mom jeans)
this denim labyrinth
your catacombs of sin
and the chrysalis within
within your mom jeans
Track Name: si me llamarías
tu pelo tan negro
lo mas bello que yo he mirado.
tu piel tan morena
que justo que mis labios la tocan.

aunque cielos sí lloran,
nunca van a nos mojar
si me llamarías tu amor.

tu corazón, en mi mente,
la única cosa que yo tener.
y el sangre que lo llena
es el agua que calma la sed mía.

aunque fuego lloverá,
nunca van a nos quemar
si me llamarías tu amor.

tus brazos, fuerte y dulce,
me envuelven cada noche triste.
nuestros sueños, que lejos son
cuando dormiremos en nuestro cajón

cuando el mundo termina
moriremos con felicidad
si me llamarías tu amor.
Track Name: cross reference
my mind has been a broken soul;
an angered wasp;
a wraith.

my heart has been a succubus
that feeds upon
your pain.

i planned your fate just years before we met; it has begun.
a mantis that reveals its bite
too soon—too late to run.

your pockets filled with leaden coins on a planet turned to gold:
the ocean washes over you and fills your doubt with cold.

i’ll take your place and drown instead; the air has bothered me
since i emerged from amniotes and breathed a mother’s plea.

encase my corpse in crystal caves
and bury me in tin
or wooden boxes used to age and mature wine and gin.

i’ll soak the sappings up and become drunk for one last night
and dream of how you could’ve been and would’ve been my light.

i’ll stumble at saint peter’s gate
and grovel at his feet
he’ll send me back to hell and then encase me in concrete.

the devil whacks away at this
for hours every day
and he’ll remind me of the time you beat my senses grey.

and that will be heaven enough, as if you’re by my side
though you’re alive and well without a hungry alibi.
Track Name: avery
i'd fallen so hard but i
picked myself up
my life far from over but
i'd had enough

and i won't let it happen again
and i won't sit and pretend

that you
aren't the whole world to me
or that you
are the first one to bleed

---

since you came to me
it's so easy to breathe
though you turn and curse me
the moment i leave

oh, let me hold you
like i used to at night
when nightmares
would wake you in fright

i'm an old man
but humor me still
remember
when life had its thrill?

---

and you
aren't a soldier or knight
you're a dragon
shortly barren from flight

you're an entity
you command all the skies
in the winter
towards the sun must you fly

but don't get too close or your
scales start to crack
and you'll realize you're burning
and you'll have to turn back

---

it gets better
life changes with ease
the ocean,
the moon, and the trees

inconstant
like the blood in your veins
in motion
like the wind through the plains

this is natural
like the galaxies unknown
vast and terrible
but god made them glow

---

don't you ever forget that
i love you to death
and you make me happy
when the sun is at rest

and the grey skies
that your smile can clear
are ephemeral
as are all these tears

and one day i promise
you will look back and laugh
at the miseries
you never thought you'd outlast
Track Name: (honey baby darling pt. II)
honey baby darling i got something to say
‘bout how you got me hung up on feeling this way
so come on, here’s how the story goes:

cocaine on the table and some weed on the floor
honey baby darling tell me what are we for
oh no don’t, don’t question why we’re here

just take it all for granted while you still can grab it
shake yourself to death and spill your brains on the ceiling

honey baby darling i guess this means good bye
honey baby darling i guess i wanna die
oh no wait, oh shit i missed my flight

i guess this means I’m stayin, at least for one more night of
songs, debauchery, high fives, and of course weird sex

what a miracle, oh what a grand stroke of luck
another night of blissful glee, and of course one last —

honey baby darling this can’t last all night
wanna make you cum wanna make you feel alright
so hit the bong one more time before we start the show
we’ll watch the lion king meanwhile we’re doing some blow
can you feel the love tonight?
out of mind and out of sight
til raven’s loud and ready to go about these lions

now i’m really leaving, babe, i’ll miss you so much
how many grueling years must i wait to feel your touch
without you, my life is miserable

walked into your city with a few hundred bucks
stepped back into mine well like i’m shit out of luck
oh no, my neighborhood’s made of gold

sell it to some children, maybe even the cop’s kids
jump into the pool cause i got nowhere to go
Track Name: suicide song [demo]
I don't need to find my wallet
I don't need to find my keys
I don't worry about time now
because it's up for me

I don't know where they will find me
somewhere far away from here
stopped somewhere along the high way
in blood up to my ears

i’m gonna put a hole
in my head

I don't care about my father
I don't care about my bread
so I don't have any money
to pay for all this dread

I still care about my mother
I still care about my dogs
I can't wait to get another
they make this house a home

i’m gonna make a home
in my head

I had had had a dream once
where the world was a dime
so we rolled up and smoked it
outside of where we dined

when can I rest again peacefully
when can I bleed from my thighs
when will I see your emotions
after I fucking die

i’m gonna put a hole
in my head

i’m gonna make a home
in my head

i’m gonna let you out
of my head
Track Name: foxing
i am losing my mind
and i’m trying to find a way out
and i am parked on the highway—
there’s blood in the driveway
and on my hands as well

you’ll thaw, with a prick of your skin,
an injection’ll make sure you’ll live
i’m high, i am high as a kite
and i’m trying to find you
in the darkness of night

but you don’t know me very well
if you don’t think i’m going to hell
i may be a sinner who’s yet to repent
but i don’t owe god a thing

oh well, well you’re broken as well
as far as i can tell and i’m a professional
the drugs, if you take them at night
will, upon morning light,
have infected your sight

the ghosts, who once rocked you to sleep
now implore you to weep all night
the sound soothes their heavy minds
from the voices that hide
under seafoamy tides

but you don’t know me very well
if you think i am doing well
my headache’s building pressure and
i just don’t know how long
i can keep this up
Track Name: dumb luck
it’s ten in the morning, i’m blazed as fuck
i’m smoking a joint on the back porch, biding my time till you wake up
i can’t remember the last time i saw your face or called your name
but even alone at night i whisper it to calm my brain
while you were gone i waited for your skin to grace mine once again
but even though you turn me on i can’t forget you’re my favorite friend

you don’t know how lucky you are to be loved by me
you don’t know how stupid you are for loving me back

i want you out of that place and into my arms by tuesday night
i could easily kidnap you because you would not put up a fight
we’ll go to the woods and take 'cid and just lay in the grass with the lightning bugs
we’ll sit under the moon and write songs and make love and smoke dank ass nugs
why do pop punk songs always talk about leaving this town
i wouldn’t leave here, this place is a heaven on earth that i have found


you don’t know how lucky you are to be loved by me
you don’t know how stupid you are for loving me back
Track Name: ¿questioning?
my anxiety is killing me again
I wish I had fourteen less friends
or none at all
this way of life is taking its toll
but some say it's nothing at all
then why's it hurt?

and if it all comes crashing down,
who gives a fuck?
and if it all comes crashing down,
what's the difference?

my anxiety is killing me again
how i can't wait for this world to end
engulfed in flames
when will i see you again?
this distance is not our friend

and if the plane comes crashing down,
well who gives a fuck?
and if the plane comes crashing down,
whats the difference?

my morality is killing me again
how i wish i could stop this violence
but your hands are cutting your thighs
and yours are all bleeding on mine

and if the knife comes crashing down,
who gives a fuck?
and if the knife comes crashing down,
whats the difference?