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you were wearing plaid in my dreams

by there will be fish

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1.
balls of yarn or carcasses either way, it's my artifice. i am decomposing too quick for this please bury me soon. this ink puts my skin at rest these scars are my latest mess. let that splinter pierce through my shallow chest. I have nothing else left to blame. when stars reach from a bove the clouds and monsters creep from their closet shrouds and the maidens fair cut their ribbons out what a travesty. no apologies for this seething rage. not a call for keys to my fleshy cage. not a passing phase nor a coming of age--oh! i was meant for the stage.
2.
aislado I see you there such a pretty stare disheveled hair like you don't care three hours of sleep you're in too deep you sow what you reap but you're too cheap (bring back mom jeans) show off them childbearing hips and your lovestained lips I just wanna take a dip in your mom jeans how do you survive the incessant cries and your bloodstained thighs that I idolize (bring back mom jeans) this denim labyrinth your catacombs of sin and the chrysalis within within your mom jeans
3.
tu pelo tan negro lo mas bello que yo he mirado. tu piel tan morena que justo que mis labios la tocan. aunque cielos sí lloran, nunca van a nos mojar si me llamarías tu amor. tu corazón, en mi mente, la única cosa que yo tener. y el sangre que lo llena es el agua que calma la sed mía. aunque fuego lloverá, nunca van a nos quemar si me llamarías tu amor. tus brazos, fuerte y dulce, me envuelven cada noche triste. nuestros sueños, que lejos son cuando dormiremos en nuestro cajón cuando el mundo termina moriremos con felicidad si me llamarías tu amor.
4.
my mind has been a broken soul; an angered wasp; a wraith. my heart has been a succubus that feeds upon your pain. i planned your fate just years before we met; it has begun. a mantis that reveals its bite too soon—too late to run. your pockets filled with leaden coins on a planet turned to gold: the ocean washes over you and fills your doubt with cold. i’ll take your place and drown instead; the air has bothered me since i emerged from amniotes and breathed a mother’s plea. encase my corpse in crystal caves and bury me in tin or wooden boxes used to age and mature wine and gin. i’ll soak the sappings up and become drunk for one last night and dream of how you could’ve been and would’ve been my light. i’ll stumble at saint peter’s gate and grovel at his feet he’ll send me back to hell and then encase me in concrete. the devil whacks away at this for hours every day and he’ll remind me of the time you beat my senses grey. and that will be heaven enough, as if you’re by my side though you’re alive and well without a hungry alibi.
5.
avery 07:12
i'd fallen so hard but i picked myself up my life far from over but i'd had enough and i won't let it happen again and i won't sit and pretend that you aren't the whole world to me or that you are the first one to bleed --- since you came to me it's so easy to breathe though you turn and curse me the moment i leave oh, let me hold you like i used to at night when nightmares would wake you in fright i'm an old man but humor me still remember when life had its thrill? --- and you aren't a soldier or knight you're a dragon shortly barren from flight you're an entity you command all the skies in the winter towards the sun must you fly but don't get too close or your scales start to crack and you'll realize you're burning and you'll have to turn back --- it gets better life changes with ease the ocean, the moon, and the trees inconstant like the blood in your veins in motion like the wind through the plains this is natural like the galaxies unknown vast and terrible but god made them glow --- don't you ever forget that i love you to death and you make me happy when the sun is at rest and the grey skies that your smile can clear are ephemeral as are all these tears and one day i promise you will look back and laugh at the miseries you never thought you'd outlast
6.
honey baby darling i got something to say ‘bout how you got me hung up on feeling this way so come on, here’s how the story goes: cocaine on the table and some weed on the floor honey baby darling tell me what are we for oh no don’t, don’t question why we’re here just take it all for granted while you still can grab it shake yourself to death and spill your brains on the ceiling honey baby darling i guess this means good bye honey baby darling i guess i wanna die oh no wait, oh shit i missed my flight i guess this means I’m stayin, at least for one more night of songs, debauchery, high fives, and of course weird sex what a miracle, oh what a grand stroke of luck another night of blissful glee, and of course one last — honey baby darling this can’t last all night wanna make you cum wanna make you feel alright so hit the bong one more time before we start the show we’ll watch the lion king meanwhile we’re doing some blow can you feel the love tonight? out of mind and out of sight til raven’s loud and ready to go about these lions now i’m really leaving, babe, i’ll miss you so much how many grueling years must i wait to feel your touch without you, my life is miserable walked into your city with a few hundred bucks stepped back into mine well like i’m shit out of luck oh no, my neighborhood’s made of gold sell it to some children, maybe even the cop’s kids jump into the pool cause i got nowhere to go
7.
I don't need to find my wallet I don't need to find my keys I don't worry about time now because it's up for me I don't know where they will find me somewhere far away from here stopped somewhere along the high way in blood up to my ears i’m gonna put a hole in my head I don't care about my father I don't care about my bread so I don't have any money to pay for all this dread I still care about my mother I still care about my dogs I can't wait to get another they make this house a home i’m gonna make a home in my head I had had had a dream once where the world was a dime so we rolled up and smoked it outside of where we dined when can I rest again peacefully when can I bleed from my thighs when will I see your emotions after I fucking die i’m gonna put a hole in my head i’m gonna make a home in my head i’m gonna let you out of my head
8.
foxing 03:19
i am losing my mind and i’m trying to find a way out and i am parked on the highway— there’s blood in the driveway and on my hands as well you’ll thaw, with a prick of your skin, an injection’ll make sure you’ll live i’m high, i am high as a kite and i’m trying to find you in the darkness of night but you don’t know me very well if you don’t think i’m going to hell i may be a sinner who’s yet to repent but i don’t owe god a thing oh well, well you’re broken as well as far as i can tell and i’m a professional the drugs, if you take them at night will, upon morning light, have infected your sight the ghosts, who once rocked you to sleep now implore you to weep all night the sound soothes their heavy minds from the voices that hide under seafoamy tides but you don’t know me very well if you think i am doing well my headache’s building pressure and i just don’t know how long i can keep this up
9.
dumb luck 02:56
it’s ten in the morning, i’m blazed as fuck i’m smoking a joint on the back porch, biding my time till you wake up i can’t remember the last time i saw your face or called your name but even alone at night i whisper it to calm my brain while you were gone i waited for your skin to grace mine once again but even though you turn me on i can’t forget you’re my favorite friend you don’t know how lucky you are to be loved by me you don’t know how stupid you are for loving me back i want you out of that place and into my arms by tuesday night i could easily kidnap you because you would not put up a fight we’ll go to the woods and take 'cid and just lay in the grass with the lightning bugs we’ll sit under the moon and write songs and make love and smoke dank ass nugs why do pop punk songs always talk about leaving this town i wouldn’t leave here, this place is a heaven on earth that i have found you don’t know how lucky you are to be loved by me you don’t know how stupid you are for loving me back
10.
11.
my anxiety is killing me again I wish I had fourteen less friends or none at all this way of life is taking its toll but some say it's nothing at all then why's it hurt? and if it all comes crashing down, who gives a fuck? and if it all comes crashing down, what's the difference? my anxiety is killing me again how i can't wait for this world to end engulfed in flames when will i see you again? this distance is not our friend and if the plane comes crashing down, well who gives a fuck? and if the plane comes crashing down, whats the difference? my morality is killing me again how i wish i could stop this violence but your hands are cutting your thighs and yours are all bleeding on mine and if the knife comes crashing down, who gives a fuck? and if the knife comes crashing down, whats the difference?

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released May 24, 2016

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there will be fish Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

an adult with a computer and a few musical instruments.
see also: IAMFYNE.bandcamp.com

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